Looking Forward to 2018

I spent some time today decluttering baby/toddler clothes. I was able to put together two medium sized boxes and a trash bag full of clothes to donate or sell. I decided to weigh the boxes/bag -- 17 pounds of clothes. It felt great to go through some of the extras and find things I can let go of, but I still need to organize what is left so that I can actually find the clothes when I need them.

This reminded me of my decluttering efforts from earlier this year. I began to follow the KonMari decluttering method. I started but I don't think I ever completely finished the second category: non-sentimental papers. I promised myself I would continue the process when we moved this summer, but I have not gotten back into it.

Then I began thinking about my goals for 2018. I tend to set many goals in a wide variety of categories. I usually make strides on all or most of them but rarely seem to be able to actually accomplish them. However, as I continue to grow up and mature, I am finding what works for me. I seem to make a little more progress every year. I have been able to be at peace with not finishing my goals but simply making strides.

But this year, I want to be a finisher.

In 2017, I spent nine months pregnant and then gave birth. I completed 12 college classes (36 hours). My husband and I completed a God-centered marriage program to help strengthen our relationship with each other and God. We had some big expenses but paid cash for all of them, avoiding any new debt. I blogged for 100 consecutive days. I went on my first real vacation (which was basically our honeymoon... two years later). We said good-bye to our first home as a married couple (a teeny tiny little apartment) and moved on to an amazing town home. All in all, a pretty exciting year mixed in to all the mundane of the day to day.

What I am looking forward to accomplishing/making progress toward in 2018:

• Losing 100+ pounds. I started this goal almost two weeks ago (why not get a head start?). I look forward to crushing it with healthy food as well as trying my hand at strength training (something I haven't really ever done). I am going to try to lose as much weight as possible (and is healthy) while I am on maternity leave so that I have a jump-start for when I go back to work. Working means less time to cook and do dishes. It also means stress and temptations. Getting this head start is super helpful for me in accomplishing this goal.
• Finish my BA degree. I need 4 classes (12 hours). I would love to finish by May as long as it does not distract me too much from family. If I need to take it slower, I will, and I will still finish before the end of 2018.
• Continue to work on business ventures that could potentially turn into passive income for my family.
• Get back to decluttering my home.
• Possibly finish and publish an ebook I started this year. Still not 100% committed to this one, but I want to at least take some time to review what I have already written on the book and make a decision.

I have a ton of other little goals that I would like to accomplish as well. However, the most important thing is being present with my family. I feel like my daughter's first year went by in a flash. I remember it, but at the same time I sometimes feel like I don't. I would hate for it to feel that same way with my son's first year. Although my goals are meant to help make my family better, I do not want to lose sight of them as I work to accomplish these goals.

What do you plan to accomplish in 2018? 

How do you plan to get there?

Photo by NordWood Themes on Unsplash

Quick thoughts...

My computer is running an update that has been taking all morning to complete. Two hours later it is at like 20%. So, I bring you a few super quick thoughts I am having this morning, written from my cell phone:

-Day 4 of teaching my child to use the potty chair. I would have given up by now if my husband had not been helping me. It seriously is a job for two when your child is this stubborn.

-I wonder if I'm spending too much time on my cell phone instead of enjoying this time off with my kids...

-And with that, I will sign off, put the phone away, and get on the floor to play with my children

Long Shot (Netflix Original review)

As you may be able to tell, I enjoy crime documentaries. Netflix has been excellent at releasing documentaries that expose the holes in our investigative and justice systems. I recently watched "Long Shot", a 40 minute documentary about a man possibly facing death row simply because he could not prove his alibi.

Juan Catalan had an older brother who was involved in gangs and violence. However, Juan did not follow in his brother's footsteps. When an eyewitness supposedly matches Juan to a violent crime, he is suddenly facing the possibility of death row.

All this time, Juan denies he committed the crime and realizes he had an alibi: he was at a Dodgers game. But providing a ticket stub was not enough. He had to prove he was there.

His lawyer works hard to try to provide this evidence. It is a nail-biting process.

The documentary leaves us with thinking about the "What ifs". There were so many things that happened that if the stars had not aligned, Juan's outcome may have been much less pleasant. The film asks us to try to not live in paranoia of the what ifs, but you have to wonder...

My husband and I agreed that if the documentary accurately portrays the case, the evidence against Juan was weak. If he had been convicted on the "evidence" presented and sent to death row, then that is most certainly an injustice. This felt like a case where he was guilty until he could prove himself innocent which is the opposite of what I like to think our justice system is about. Maybe I'm wrong.

Did you watch this documentary? What did you take away from it?

Why I started Whole30 two weeks postpartum

The Whole30 is a strict elimination program that lasts 30 days (plus 15 days of re-introduction) to help heal your body (especially your gut), tame the sugar dragon, and help participants know what makes their body feel less than optimal. The vast majority of participants also lose weight and/or see body composition improve.

I did two rounds of Whole30 after I gave birth to my daughter. It helped me to lose the weight I had gained during pregnancy and cut cravings. I did these rounds in the spring and summer of 2016.

Unfortunately, I started incorporating the foods that made me feel bloated and sluggish back into my diet in late 2016. I did not get back on track for the entirety of 2017. Granted, I was pregnant for most of 2017, but that didn't mean I had to eat whatever I wanted and gain 50lb (a "healthy" weight gain for a pregnant woman my size would have been about 20lb).

Between the weight gain, already being heavy to begin with, and eating less-than-healthy foods, I felt pretty terrible the last trimester. My energy was super low. I was getting 7-8 hours of sleep a night but as soon as I started maternity leave I started napping in the afternoon as well. I just felt blah.

I had been thinking about wanting to get down to a weight that would be more optimal for my size for the entire duration of my pregnancy. Obviously pregnancy is not a time to lose weight, so I had to wait.

I started Whole30 two weeks postpartum because I knew that I could 1) eat plenty of food to still produce breastmilk for my baby while 2) helping tame my sugar cravings, start feeling better, and lose weight.

Some people may think that I'm crazy to do such an extreme program so soon after having a baby. The truth is: this is actually a great time! Since I normally work outside the home, being off work means having a lot more time to cook and do dishes. Plus, I don't have all of the office treats (think: breakfast tacos, cookies, cakes, and pizza parties) constantly being thrown at me in addition to vending machines in the break room and fast food places on my drive to work.

If you read my post yesterday, you'll know that I am also trying to help my daughter learn to use the potty while nursing a newborn while doing a Whole30. So yes, maybe I am a little crazy. But being a parent does not excuse me from taking care of myself. If anything, it gives me a greater sense of urgency. I need to do this -- for myself and for my family.

It took me over an hour to write this post

Today, I am attempting to teach my older child how to use the potty.

My older child (almost two years old) is running around today without a diaper or pants on. We are going to the bathroom every 10-15 minutes for her to sit on her potty chair for a minute or two. While we sit, we're reading books, looking at pictures, and "talking".

I started making my breakfast about 8:40 and finally sat down to take a bite at 9:17. It was cold. My eating was then interrupted by a potty break.

I also have a 3 week old child who is breastfed on demand. So far I have been able to squeeze his feedings in between potty visits, but I know this will be a challenge.

I opened up my computer to write this blog post around the time I started to fix my breakfast. I am finally hitting publish at 9:54. Hint: that's why there is no stock photo. If I wasn't part of a daily blogging challenge, this post would not be happening.

I am still in my pajamas however I did manage to brush my teeth. Maybe I will have a chance to change clothes by noon.

This potty learning process is supposed to take three to four days. And that's not even including the nighttime potty needs... just the daytime.

As my dad likes to remind me: "This parenting thing isn't for the faint of heart".

So here I go, armed with my pet odor and stain remover spray, lots of picture books to look at while we sit, sticker rewards for her successes, and as much patience as I can muster.

Becoming a Mother of Two

I had a lot of people tell me this last pregnancy that going from one child to two is a lot harder than going from two to three.

Photo by Joshua Clay on Unsplash

From my current experience, I can vouch that becoming a mother of two has definitely felt different than becoming a mother to my first.

With my first, I constantly thought about my baby and being pregnant. I would say things like, "We're going to have a baby!" and "I can't wait to meet my daughter" all the time.

With my second, I would literally forget I was pregnant sometimes (sorry, son!) until I had to pee again for the 57th time that morning.

With my first, I counted down the weeks and days, read all the apps giving me updates on my growing baby, and felt like my due date was forever away.

With my second, I sometimes read from one of the apps if I remembered and had a second. My due date felt like forever away the first week or two of pregnancy and then all of a sudden it was here.

With my first, I could sit around and just watch her sleep as a newborn. I would hold her for hours on end.

With my second, I sometimes feel guilty for having to set him down for an hour or two while he sleeps in order to get my daughter dressed and fed, get myself presentable, and maybe do the dishes.

There truly is something special about your first baby that is just different. I would encourage first time moms to relish it. I absolutely love my second child -- he is amazing! But I have just not been able to dedicate the undivided attention to him as I could to my daughter. Every moment is amazing, though, and I am thankful for each and every one. The most heart-warming change with having the second child is watching the first one interact with him. She hugs, kisses, and tries to cuddle him, she talks to him, and she watches as I feed him. It's fun to have a little shadow "helping" me through these newborn days the second time around.

Old-Fashioned Thank You Notes

I'm not sure what it is about having a baby but people become extremely generous. I have been absolutely blessed and amazed by all the love (poured out to my family through diapers, clothes, other baby gear, and even gifts for my older child) that people have shown us in the past few months.

Photo by Kelly Sikkema on Unsplash

There are times I become overwhelmed with all the gifts, feeling that we are not worthy of all this love and support. It is hard to express just how amazed and grateful I am.

One small way I try to express to these friends, family, and co-workers how much I appreciate their acts of kindness and generosity is through a handwritten thank you note. I ordered some customized thank you notes from VistaPrint and after someone gives me a gift I take the time to write a few sentences, address the envelope, and mail a note to whoever the gifter was. I work hard to make sure I do not forget to thank anyone through a handwritten note. It's truly not much, but to me it represents to the gifter that I sat down and thought about them, their gift, and my gratitude toward them.

I believe that in this age of impersonal internet communication, a personal and old-fashioned form of communication is a breath of fresh air for many. In addition, making sure that those who showed generosity to me know they are appreciated is super important to me. They could not possibly know how much I appreciate my village coming together to make this stage of life less stressful, but maybe a handwritten note will give them an idea.

Robots: Taking our Jobs or Making us Money?

People tend to worry about robots taking their jobs. But what if robots could be used to make us money?

I decided to try out a new investing program called Heleum. According to the creators of the program, "Heleum is a savings app that uses fluctuations in world & cryptocurrency conversion rates to make money for its users".

Photo by Luca Upper on Unsplash

Basically, you throw in some money (some people start out with as little as a $5 investment), and you allow the program to invest and trade your money in currencies.

What I think is especially cool about Heleum:

• Robots are essentially day trading for you (so if you have no skill or desire to sit and monitor world and crypto currencies and try to make trades, you don't have to!)
• Heleum invests in both world and cryptocurrencies so you can take advantage of the major gains going on in the cryptocurrency world right now
• Your money is split up into different "balloons" so that not all of your money is in the same investment
• You don't have to think about or check on your money often. I've been looking at the app once a day out of curiosity. I just invested my money about five days ago and I've gone up and down, but mostly up.

I put in a couple hundred dollars for now just to experiment and see what happens. I am currently at a gain of $0.82 which doesn't sound like much. But with ten times that initial investment in my bank, I get a whopping $0.01/month. I've made 82x that in five days with Heleum.

Heleum creators advertise it as a savings accelerator. It's not a way to get rich quick, but it is a way to utilize robots to make more money.

If you want to try it, I'd appreciate if you went through my referral link so that I can get a bonus.

Breaking the Bathroom Scale Habit

After gaining 50lb this pregnancy (and still being up 25lb from the last pregnancy), I am beginning my journey "back down the scale". At this heavy of a weight, my energy is terrible and my health can't be great either. I have my age going for me, but that advantage fades a little with each passing day. I know it will catch up with me if I don't get ahold of things now.

Photo by ja ma on Unsplash

My first two weeks postpartum, I ate pretty much whatever I wanted including two or three desserts/sweets per day, lots of bread and cereal, and lots of milk (which I normally don't drink and typically causes me to gain weight). After giving myself that time of freedom as I recovered from childbirth, my husband and I committed to a change in our eating habits. I still can't really workout -- just taking short, leisurely walks for now. But I can eat in a way that is healthy and still provides me with more than enough food I need to produce milk for my son.

We are only on our sixth morning of this new routine, and I so desperately wanted to step on the scale this morning. If I could just see that I've lost a couple pounds, I could stay motivated, right?

Well I know from past experience that the number on the scale is deceiving. It can also become a roadblock. If I get to a weight that I deem "acceptable", I start to slide on my new habits. A cheat treat turns into a cheat day which turns into a cheat weekend. Sometimes I completely abandon my new habits and won't eat something green for months.

The yo-yoing has to stop.

The number on the scale is exciting and does reflect one small portion of my progress, but how I feel and how my health has improved are the ultimate goals -- and those can't be measured on the bathroom scale.

The Confession Tapes (Netflix Series Review)

Would you confess to a crime you did not commit?

None of us want to believe that we or any other human being would be so stupid. In the Netflix Original Series called "The Confession Tapes", this phenomenon is explored through six real cases. Viewers of this docuseries find out just how much our investigative officers can fail us and our justice system allows it to slide. We see story after story showing us how reasonable doubt would have likely freed people in all of these cases... if only they had not confessed.

Who would confess to something they didn't do? most people think.

A few reasons, as explored in the series, include:

• False promises of going home
• Long, drawn out interrogations without a lawyer present
• Police officers selectively taping interrogations to hide the lies they told and tactics they used early in the interrogation
• Setting up young and vulnerable teens to give a false confession to undercover agents
• Using hypnotic techniques during interrogation
• Devices such as a polygraph also played into people's minds, convincing them to confess because they "failed" the test
• Questioning parents who were still grieving the loss of their child(ren)

This series also explores the media's role in some of these cases and how that twisted the truth, sometimes even twisting it in the minds of the suspects. The media would also pit the local community against the suspects, seemingly sealing their fate.

It's definitely a disturbing thought -- that innocent people were coerced into a confession and ended up behind bars. America is said to have one of the best justice systems in the world. Unfortunately, though, if the investigators have pinned a certain person as the criminal, they can sometimes develop tunnel vision and work hard to take down that suspect, neglecting all other leads. They manipulate to get what they need. They may believe they are doing the right thing, but it has landed innocent people behind bars.

My number one take away from the series: if I am ever accused of anything and taken in for questioning, I will be asking for a lawyer and keeping my mouth shut until council arrives. Even if I am innocent, I cannot rely on the system and the evidence to clear me.

Giving birth = empowerment

Photo by Kelly Sikkema on Unsplash

I gave birth to my second baby a little over two weeks ago. Like my first, I planned for a homebirth and was able to fulfill my goal due to a complication-free pregnancy, labor, and delivery as well as careful planning and having plenty of support.

Because I have been overweight for the majority of my life, I can sometimes feel pretty low about my body. Plus, I managed to gain right around 50lb with each pregnancy (when a "healthy" recommended pregnancy weight gain for a woman my size would have been less than 20lb). Sometimes I hate the way my body looks. But right now, in the wake of giving birth at home, I feel like my body is pretty badass.

I will admit that birth is an experience that can make you feel like you are on the edge of death. I never felt like I was going to actually die, but during both labors I remember coming to a point of thinking/saying "I can't do this much longer". I remember asking for help. I remember relying on the support of my doula, my husband, my mother, my sister, and my dad. I will be forever grateful for the strength and comfort that they gave me. If I had been completely alone, I think I would have survived. But with the extra hands of support and love, I am able to look back at my experiences with even more fondness.

Giving birth is an experience that a woman remembers for a lifetime. She may not remember all the details and specifics, but she will remember how she felt. How a woman is treated, comforted, supported, and spoken to during her labor and delivery will leave a lasting impact.

I hope all women feel empowered after giving birth, no matter how or where they do it. It is an amazing feat!

Cooking from the comfort of my computer

I've blogged in the past about my struggle to cook at home. Now that I have a newborn and an almost two year old to take care of, I am not too interested in sitting down at a restaurant anytime soon. So it was time to push myself. Some people like to cook, but I'm just not one of them yet. I have to make it easy.

In the past few days, I have cooked three clean and healthy crock pot meals and the majority of the work I put into these meals was done at my computer.

How to feel like you're cooking but put in minimal effort:

• Open Google or Pinterest. Search for easy, healthy crock pot recipes. Find a few you want to try.
• Order ingredients for recipes of interest from Wal Mart Grocery Pickup (or another store that does curbside service)
• Pick up ingredients
• Assemble in the crock pot/let cook
• Eat!

This week I did a broccoli beef, chicken curry, and a butternut squash soup. I thoroughly enjoyed two out of three recipes and the third I think I can tweak to my liking. All I did was assemble the ingredients that I picked up from the store in the crock pot and let it cook. The chicken in the chicken curry I had to shred but that took less than five minutes. Other than that, these took minimal work and effort. I honestly am not sure it could get easier! If I can't make this work then I'm a lost cause ;-)

I look forward to finding more easy, healthy crock pot recipes. If you have any to share, please drop a link in the comments!